How to Regulate Your Nervous System (Without Becoming a Wellness Robot)

Struggling with stress or overwhelm? Learn how to regulate your nervous system with simple, science-backed techniques for calm and wellbeing.

Ever had one of those days where a dropped spoon has you ready to cry? Or you feel like your brain is stuck in molasses while your heart’s doing laps in your chest? Yeah – same.

What you’re probably feeling in those moments is a dysregulated nervous system.

It’s not just stress, and it’s not “just being sensitive”. Your body has actually flipped into survival mode. The good news? You can gently guide it back.

In this post, I’m breaking down how to regulate your nervous system, how to spot when it’s struggling, what causes that dysregulated feeling, and what calming your nervous system can do for your overall wellbeing. No confusing science degree required – just you, your breath, and maybe a cuppa.

How Your Nervous System Actually Works (Without the Jargon)

Let’s keep this simple. Your nervous system is basically your body’s control centre. It’s always scanning your environment and making decisions for you – like whether to chill out or go into panic mode.

Two key parts are the:

Sympathetic nervous system – aka your “fight or flight” response. This kicks in when your body thinks you’re in danger.
Parasympathetic nervous system – your “rest and digest” mode. This is where you feel safe, connected, and calm.

When you’re regulated, your nervous system moves flexibly between these states depending on what you need. But if you’ve been through ongoing stress or trauma, that flexibility can get stuck – hello, nervous system dysregulation.

Signs Your Nervous System Might Be Dysregulated

So how do you know if your nervous system is out of whack? It doesn’t usually send a neat little email. Instead, it shows up in weird and confusing ways.

You might notice:

Physical signs:

Tight chest or racing heart
Digestive issues (bloating, nausea, IBS symptoms)
Muscle tension, headaches
Exhaustion no matter how much you rest

Emotional signs:

Anxiety or panic
Feeling numb or disconnected
Mood swings or irritability
Constant overwhelm or dread

Mental and behavioural signs:

Brain fog or poor concentration
Insomnia or wired-but-tired energy
Avoidance or overworking
People-pleasing or total withdrawal

Some days you might flip between these states rapidly – calm one minute, spiralling the next. That’s a big clue your nervous system is stuck in survival mode.

What Causes a Dysregulated Nervous System?

There’s no single cause – and often it’s a buildup over time. Here are some common culprits:

Chronic stress – like ongoing work pressure, financial anxiety, or caregiving with no breaks.
Trauma – including childhood trauma, relational trauma, or even one off-scary experiences.
Lack of sleep or rest – you body never gets time to shift into recovery mode.
Poor diet and gut health – especially inflammatory foods or blood sugar crashes.
Overstimulation – constant noise, screens, to-do lists.
Not feeling safe or supported – emotionally or physically.

Sometimes just modern life itself can push our systems to the edge. We weren’t exactly built to juggle group chats, deadlines, and world news all at once.

The Benefits of Regulating Your Nervous System

Regulating your nervous system isn’t about becoming super zen 24/7. It’s about giving your body more opportunities to feel safe – so it doesn’t have to be in survival mode all the time.

Here’s what nervous system regulation can actually do:

Better sleep and digestion
Calmer mood and less anxiety
Improved focus and productivity
Stronger immunity and energy levels
More resilience in stressful situations
Deeper relationships and connection with others

It’s like upgrading your operating system. Life still happens – but you just have way more bandwith to handle it.

How to Regulate Your Nervous System (That Actually Works)

There’s no one-size-fits-all, but here are evidence-backed, natural ways to regulate your nervous system.

Try a few and see what feels right for you; it’ll be different for everyone and you body will usually let you know what’s right.

1. Breathwork (yes, it really works)

Slowing your breathing tells your nervous it’s safe. Try:

Box breathing – inhale for 4, hold for 4, exhaled for 4, hold for 4.
4-7-8 breathing – inhale for 4, hold for 7, exhale for 8 (good sleep).
Longer exhales – make your exhale slightly longer than your inhale to activate the parasympathetic system.

2. Cold exposure

It doesn’t have to be icy frozen levels, but you can:

Splash cold water on your face
End your shower with 30 seconds of cold
Use a cold compress on your neck or chest

Cold stimulates the vagus nerve, which helps bring the body back to calm.

Personally, I find cold exposure too stressful for my body, yet other people swear by it. But that’s why it’s important to listen to your body and find what works for you personally.

3. Grounding in nature

Touching natural surfaces (grass, soil, even water) helps calm the nervous system and lower cortisol. Unless maybe if you’ve got severe allergies.

Try these:

Go barefoot on grass
Potter in the garden
Sit with your back against a tree
Try a sensory walk (notice sounds, smells, textures)

4. Somatic movement

Sometimes we need to get out of our heads and into our bodies. Try:

Gentle stretching or yoga
Shaking (literally, shake it out like an animal after stress or like the Taylor Swift song)
Dancing to a favourite song (I swear by dancing it out, thank Christina Yang for that)
Rocking back and forth (great for self-soothing)

5. Vagus nerve stimulation

The vagus nerve is a major player in nervous system regulation. Easy ways to stimulate it:

Humming or singing (especially deep sounds)
Gargling water for 30 seconds
Chanting “om” or deep toning
Laughing (real or even fake laughing can help)

These ones especially may make you feel a little silly, personally I’d recommend doing these by yourself if you’re a bit nervous and remember that the benefits will outweigh and embarrassment you may feel! (hopefully)

6. Meditation & mindfulness

These practices help you become more aware of your internal state – and allow your nervous system to shift out of reactivity.

Try a body scan meditation
Use a guided safe space visualisation
Focus on all 5 senses to anchor yourself to the present

Tip: Even 2 minutes of stillness is enough to start retraining your nervous system.

7. Human connection

Feeling safe with others is one of the most powerful forms of regulation.

Hug someone for 20+ seconds
Spend time with people who feel grounding, not draining
Talk to a therapist, coach, or support group
Cuddle a pet (they’re nervous system heroes)

Nervous System Regulation FAQs

How long does it take to regulate your nervous system?

It really depends on your starting point. Small practices done consistently can make a noticeable difference in days or weeks – but deeper nervous system healing can take time, especially after trauma.

Be patient. Think of it like re-learning safety.

Is regulating your nervous system the same as mindfulness?

Mindfulness is one tool that supports regulation – but regulation also includes physical, social, and lifestyle elements. Breathwork, sleep, diet, and even movement are just as important.

What’s the fastest way to calm your nervous system?

Try combining breathwork + somatic movement + meditation. Example: dance it out, and then sit down and do slow breathing whilst completing a body scan meditation for 5 minutes. Quick, free, and effective.

Can you heal your nervous system after trauma?

Yes. It’s absolutely possible to rebuild safety and resilience, even after chronic or complex trauma. Somatic therapies, gentle practices, and a supportive environment can make a huge difference.

Can kids and teens benefit from nervous system regulation too?

Definitely. Nervous system regulation doesn’t have an age range and it can help people of all ages – and many of these techniques can be turned into fun games or rituals for younger people (or adults too, trust me).

Final Thoughts: Start Small, Stay Gentle

Your nervous system doesn’t need you to overhaul your life overnight. It just wants to feel safe – again and again, in small ways.

So take the pressure off. You don’t have to meditate on a mountaintop or breathe in perfect squares.

Start by noticing your body. Give it breaks. Get outside. Hum a song. And know that every time you pause to regulate, you’re helping your entire system feel a little more at home in itself.

You’ve got this.